Becca-Pink’s blog

What are you most looking forward to this weekend?

Feeling confident about my exams. I have three next week and a lot of work to do for the last one. 

Ok, that's enough of the depressing posts. I'm sorry guys! If I start sounded depressed again, just let me know! Deary me!

Do you have a particular "catch phrase" for which you are known?

When I find something very funny I usually say "that roffled my waffle" or "that tickled my pickle".

If someone does something really annoying or stupid I say "Someone's cool!" as part of my sarcasm. 

I have many more sayings. I really need to buy a dictionary and learn some new words!..x

At this moment, I am sitting in the corner of my dining room on our eMac computer. The room is filled with the smell of yoghurt and there is a slight draft coming in the cracks of the window beside me. It’s 20.37 and I am in one of the worst moods I have been in a long time. In my living room across the hall I can hear my mum watching the results of ‘Dancing On Ice’ – a programme where celebrities are challenged to compete each week in ice dancing. She laughs loudly every so often to the murmur of the presenter’s voice. My dad is in the kitchen, clearing away the remainders of his home-cooked dinner. My younger brother is sitting in his room upstairs, on his computer, the place where he is every spare moment of his life. He has started to develop a bit of an attitude. He doesn’t even say hi anymore but just mumbles and complains. We fight a lot more now than we used to and we’ve become two very different people. I don’t know him anymore. Every time I try to have a conversation with him he just tells me to ‘shut up’ or ‘stop laughing’ and starts screaming at me until he gets so angry that he has to physically attack me before he can calm down. Just this morning I was laughing at something. He was sitting beside me on his computer with his headphones in his ears. He started saying to me:
“Shut up Rebecca!” 
“No-one likes you”,
“I’m serious, I don’t know a single person who says they like you, all my friends hate you”
I know that is an exaggeration and it didn’t hurt, it surprised me more than anything. I hadn’t done anything to him, I was laughing at something that I saw on the television and he comes at me like I’ve just pinched his scone! He’s done worse I suppose. I can hear it in the way he speaks, disrespect and selfishness. I have let my parents know what he does to me and how he’s the only person in this world that makes me flip. My parent’s love us both and they have to treat us equally, which I understand, but yet he still does it. Half the time I don’t say anything to my parents, as I know it won’t get me anywhere. But, to have to live with someone, who makes me angrier than anything else in the world, reduces me to tears, makes me feel so small and weak (even though I’m older) is so rude and disrespectful towards me and who is going to be my ‘brother’ for the rest of my life infuriates me so much that I can’t even bear to think about it. Things would be so much better if there was a camera in the room every time Yet, I always seem to give in when he’s in one of his ‘good moods’. But not a day goes by without even the smallest clash of words. Today, for example, I was studying in this exact room as the view from window relaxes me and makes me feel at ease. My brother had gone out to play about the streets with some friends. He phones my mum to ask if he can bring them home and if they can go on the play station and computer – which are in the same room as me. My mum says no to him as I am studying in that room. An hour later he brings them home anyway, regardless of what my mum just told him and with no respect to any of us. I end up having to finish off an English essay with them all shouting and screaming in my ear. Before my brother left the house at lunchtime he was sitting at his computer (yet again!) and my mum came in to sit down after an incredibly stressful week. My brother announces he’s hungry and says “I want some food” but doesn’t show the slightest care about getting it himself. I look at my mum and she sighs and asks what he wants for his lunch. He just sits there, demanding all these things and my mum, the hero that she is, doesn’t seem the slightest bit bothered, she just stands up and gets on with it. I sit staring at my brother, wondering why he treats people so badly. Apparently, it’s just a phase he’s going through and he will eventually grow out of it. I don’t know if I can wait that long as the number of days until I crack are narrowing. My mum once told me that I was similar to that when I was younger. I can remember being a really horrible person and a bully but I was so much younger then and I have matured. My brother is a lot worse and the hours he spends on his computer are having an effect on his mind. If he does ever grow out of it I don’t think I’ll ever forget what he’s done. He has made me so miserable and angry (at the worst times) that I don’t think forgiveness is even an answer. He’s meant to be a genius, he can read three books in a day, is doing the same maths as the year above him and uses words I’ve never even heard of. I feel that he is much smarter and wiser than me when it comes to school but I am much when it comes to life. That can be a good thing as life lasts longer than school. 
I just hope that one day my brother opens his eyes and tries to fix all the damage he has left behind him. I don’t know what’s going to happen when I leave home but I’m certainly not thinking of missing him.

This is one of my favourite songs. I thought I would share it with you. For those of you who live outside the UK you probably won't know who Richard Fleeshman is. He is an actor from one of the countries greatest soaps and has recently been discovered for his singing talents. Enjoy.

Okay guys! I promised in my very first post that I would write an entry once i'd been to see Joseph. So, here it is. It was absolutely phenomenal! I'm sure I have seen 'Joseph And The Technicolor Dreamcoat' over 20 times and this has to be the first one to make me cry. I'm not sure if it was because I knew the guys who were playing the main parts or if it was because they were really good but both my mother and myself had our eyes filling up with tears. I knew so many people in it and i wish i'd been apart of it. The show is no longer running but it has to be one of the best to ever play in this city. Afterwards, my mum and me went to the next door bar to wait for the cast to pop in for a drink (we'd heard that was where they went after shows). Unfortunately, they never appeared. Maybe that's because it was a matinee performance and their evening one was only an hour later! 

I am in such an amazing mood right now. I feel like no-one can bring me down. I have just seen 'PS I Love You' in the cinema and it has made me feel so... i'm not sure what the right word is but i'll use positive. I feel very happy and content. The film was basically about love and how one person can change your life and make you feel so special and happy. 'PS I Love You' has so many wise messages about love and about life that it really does open your eyes to what is happening in your life -  if that sort of thing affects you.  I think I changed within the whole 2 hours of that film. I need to take my time growing up and cherish moments. I always say that and never really mean it but this time I do. If you haven't already seen 'PS I Love You' then I would highly recommend you get a ticket for its next screening. If it doesn't have a similar affect on you than it did on me or it doesn't at least make a tear run down your cheek then I apologize for making you see it. It really moved me. I'm sure that director Richard LaGravenese will be pleased to know that his film has made a mark on someone's life, that he will leave something behind him that has changed the life of another person. I think I might delete my Bebo and MySpace profiles - they're making me someone i'm not. A bit like my friends, bless them, they don't mean any harm, they just don't see life the way I do. If you have read this then please leave me a comment, even if you haven't seen the film and you have no idea what i'm talking about. It's just nice to know that someone took the time to read this.

Who is on your "Top Five Celebrities" List?

Carrie Underwood

Celine Dion

Jonathan Ross

Tyra Banks 

Dermot O'Leary

How do you want 2008 to be different from 2007? What will you change or do differently?  

Ok, I'm going to answer my own question. I want 2008 to have less drama and and I want to get the people out of my life who just make me miserable and constantly make me ask questions about myself. I want to treat people with the love and respect they deserve and I want to achieve more things. I think I will focus a lot more on my future and relationships. I want 2008 to open so many doors and my 2009 I want to know where I am going and look back at 2008 and think "Wow! That was a great year!".

I am glad to see how my question of the day submission has got most of you thinking about the year ahead. I hope 2008 brings all that you want it to.

Becca...x